Wednesday, May 2, 2007

The Art of Toothpaste Squeezing

The Missus has issued another ultimatum: No more squeezing the toothpaste in the middle.
That's right. So you do it too.
In order to keep peace in my household, my analytical brain went into overdrive for a solution.
It was then that I encountered words of wisdom in the "Art of Toothpaste Squeezing" from something called Bonanza World and answers from some so-called experts.
Here's one from 'Shlynn': A thought-provoking question. How do you squeeze your toothpaste. Usually I'll buy the ones that stand on the bathroom sink, where it doesn't matter where you squeeze it, it always comes out. Unfortunately, this last time I bought the tube squeeze toothpaste (a topper squeezer is me), and now I have paste gook all at the top. Yuck!
From 'Camera_Chic': Usually I grab the tube and squeeze it from the middle. It annoys my sister a lot, though, and she always comes in after me and squeezes it up from the bottom.
From 'ALC': I remember when I was little my grandma taught me to squeeze from the bottom of the tube one night when I was staying over ... just stuck with me all these years ... thanks grandma! :)
From 'Shiva': Top squeezer for me. I remember trying to do the squeeze-n-roll thing once, but it always came unrolled so I gave up on that one.
From 'Jeanie Cartwright': I squeeze pretty much anywhere, but usually in the middle. However, every couple of weeks or so, I'll lay the tube on the counter and moosh all the stuff that's at the bottom up to the top so it's easier to squeeze. Hubby and I use different tubes of toothpaste so we can do whatever makes us happy and not have to worry about ticking anyone else off.
From 'Milesky1': We have a little plastic do-hickey that slides onto the bottom of the tube, and instead of squeezing, as you slide it up, the toothpaste comes out. I guess that makes me closest to a 'bottom roller squeezer.'
From 'Karine': I squeeze it from the bottom. I don't like to squeeze from the middle.
From 'Sammiandmilo': I squeeze it anywhere, then when it starts to run out I squeeze the toothpaste in the bottom to the top.
From 'Sissy': Wherever I grab it is where I squeeze it. Most times, though, it's in the middle.
From 'LifesMagic': I'm an anywhere squeezer and when I'm having trouble getting some out, I'll either squeeze from the bottom or lay the tube down and use something to push the paste up so it works again!
From 'Anna': I squeeze anywhere. I kinda have a toothpaste fetish, I love buying and using toothpaste, so when I've squeezed the bulk of the paste out I just use a different tube. My brother and I have had to buy separate toothpastes because he is a bottom and roll guy, he even bought one of those rolly things. Weird.
From 'Bonanzagal': I just squeeze anywhere, just as long as I get toothpaste!
So you see, Missus, I'm not insane. Maybe, a bit misguided, so now onto the next earthshattering question(s) from Bonanza World: Toilet paper, free end hanging over the top of the roll, or dangling out from the bottom? Then there's another puzzler: Kitchen sponges ... one for the dishes, one for the floor or single sponge only?
"Have you any more questions?" I asked The Missus.
"Just one," she replied. "When are you ever going to learn to read a map?"
They have a long-term memory, don't they?
It's been a dozen years or so since we took a 300-mile detour somewhere in northern Michigan.
WHAT'S AMERICA'S BIGGEST BEEF WITH BIKE GEAR? That's a trick question, you might ask. No, a new survey released by Bell Sports claims it's sore rears. It went on to say: While three-quarters of the 1,062 respondents ride less often now than in the past 10 years, 79 per cent said they would ride more often if their key concerns about bike riding were resolved. Then came the reason: "In the category of bicycling gear, the No. 1 complaint was hard seats. Fifty-seven per cent said they would prefer bike seats with extra padding for added comfort. Flat tires were the second most cited complaint, with 36 per cent of riders saying they wish they had tires that could immediately seal themselves after a puncture."
SPEAKING OF SORE WHAT-EVERS: In my Vernon travels, I have discovered the Spine & Sports Physical Therapy place (3607-31st Street -- Beside the Civic Arena, Phone: 558-9998). Maybe, it's not the spot for the Ol' Columnist, whose most strenous physical exercise these days is involved with the TV clicker (man, I have strong thumbs), but it's definitely the right place for children, youth and adults actively involved in sports. Top-notch physical therapists include Bob Powls, Cheryl Witter and Lisa Crockett. Now, folks, it's about this "thumb" therapy?
THE HOTTEST TICKET IN TOWN: Heather Kjarsgaard of the Visitor Infocentre (on Highway 97 towards Kelowna) passes along this info that wineries are definitely the 'ticket' in the Okanagan Valley & Similkameen in 2005. One to check out in the Vernon area is Hunting Hawk Vineyards at O'Keefe Historic Ranch, 9380 Hwy 97 N. Phone: (250) 546-2164 ... www.huntinghawkvineyards.com

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