Gretzky: A real class act

Wayne Gretzky has all the qualifications of being the head coach of the Phoenix Coyotes. He'll try anything once.
When the Ol' Columnist heard about The Great One becoming the 15th head coach of the NHL franchise which shifted out of drafty Winnipeg into the Arizona desert, I went scrambling for a TV video buried in a dusty cupboard.
It had a simple title: 'Gretzky & Corbett' ( Running time: Approx. 30 min.) The date was in the fall of 1981. The scene: A crowded Edmonton street and there, surrounded by teammates Cowboy Flett, Mark Messier and Brett Callighen, was Gretzky on horseback. It was the opening of the Great Gretzky's Western Corral -- a top-notch men's clothing shop.
Corbett: First time on a horse, Wayne?
Gretzky: First and last.
Corbett: What instructions did Cowboy (Flett) give you?
Gretzky: Pray and hold on.
Inside the store, I asked Flett what technique he had used.
Flett: One thing he did do was he got on the horse and he got off it ... Well, you know, Wayne'e been with me a couple of other times in different transactions with horses and he's been nervous before, but tonight he was calm, cool and collected.
Gretzky: It was the first time I ever rode alone. I was with Cowboy a couple of years ago, but he had to hold onto the reins, but (tonight) it was the first time I ever rode alone.
However, when I asked him to sing "Mommas. Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys," he refused, claiming he would do it on radio, but not on television. And then he blushed.
But what the piece of fading video told me, that a blushing Gretzky is not only the classiest athlete I have ever met, but he is also the most honest in a jaded world filled with puffed-up jocks.
He has surrounded himself with classy individuals as well, most notably, Phoenix general manager Mike Barnett. A former professional hockey player, Barnett was Gretzky's "confidante," during the years in Edmonton. Today, undoubtedly, the same formula still works in Arizona.
In Phoenix, he has put together a sharp coaching team in former Detroit Red Wings associate coach Barry Smith, former Coyotes player Rick Tocchet, and former interim head coach Rick Bowness.
When David Vest of the Arizona Republic asked him about the trio, the ever-modest Gretzky was quoted as saying, "I'm ecstatic to have this staff."
When veteran Jeremy Roenick was asked about Gretzky's coaching role, he was quoted as saying: "I think having him stand behind the bench is a great thing for the game of hockey, and we need that coming out of the lockout. He has so much pizzazz and he brings so much leverage to the game that it's a perfect thing for the National Hockey League to have Wayne more involved."
Gretzky has indeed had the Midas touch both as a player and as an executive with Team Canada and also as an 18 per cent owner in the Coyotes, so there's no reason to doubt he'll be successful in his new post.
There will be doubters, but The Great One can always remind them that he once coached a Canadian junior club for one game back in 1981-82. They won 7-0.
While scouting the wires about the Gretzky appointment, I uncovered a quote from John Iaboni of the defunct Toronto Telegram, which read: "There's a little number 9 in town who has ambitions of replacing Gordie Howe ... 10-year-old Wayne Gretzky has proven he can score goals, too." Ironically, Gretz scored 378 goals in one season in "atom" in 1971. I know, for I used to help Iaboni put the minor hockey page together for the Tely. And Gretzky's name was always prominent. So nearly 35 years later, the 44-year-old Gretzky is back in the headlines, where he belongs.
Although, I wasn't able to contact him yesterday in Phoenix, I knew he probably had become an expert horseman, but whether he can sing "Momma, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys," on key, now that's another matter.
NOW THAT'S COSTLY: When Vancouver Canucks' Todd Bertuzzi flattened Colorado's Steve Moore way back on March 8, 2004, it not only caused 'Bert' a devastating suspension, but it cost him $501, 916.39 US in salary, according to the CBC website. That's a hefty price to pay, in any league. NHL head honcho Gary Bettman confirmed Bertuzzi's reinstatement, accompanied by a truckful of legalese.
MORE FROM UNCLE JOHN'S BATHROOM READER: The Quack: Dr. Elisha Perkins. Specialty: A contraption called, "the Tractor," patented in 1796. Treatment: The Tractor, which was made up of two rods -- one copper, zinc, and gold, and one silver, platinum, and iron -- was passed over a sick person. Perkins preached that it literally pulled diseases out of the body and patients such as George Washington and Chief Justice Oliver Ellsworth of the U.S. Supreme Court believed him. Final Diagnosis: Medical experts of the day knew Perkins was a fake, but Perkins may have managed to fool himself. Armed with his magic rods, he traveled to New York in 1799 to treat the victims of a yellow fever epidemic that was sweeping the city. He didn't cure a single person and, a few weeks later, succumbed to the disease himself.