So what's your blog, Ms.?

In the bad, old days, the chauvinist's standard line was: "So what's your sign, baby?" Not anymore. In this so-called enlightened era, it's: "What's your blog, Ms.?
That's right, the computer age has shifted into high gear and now everyone can be in Blog Heaven or Hades.
The Blog (now, that's an ugly word, isn't it?) has even become mainstream in staid and sedate Vernon.
The Ol' Columnist, well past any pickup lines, was searching the web yesterday, and came upon the Vernon Blog. This is what it read: Don Quixote vs. City Hall. When an American gets mad, he says, "where's my gun." When a Canadian gets peed off he says, "Where is my pen, I'm going to send a letter to the EDITOR." When the EDITOR won't publish his letter he sets up his own BLOG page."
This computer-age creature lifted news reports from the CBC to KISS-FM to That Other Vernon paper to even The Daily Courier. He, She or It didn't seem to care, where the reports came from, as long as they were worthy of a Blog.
Some bloggers are not so anonymous.
An old friend, newsman Pierre Bourque, who incidentally has a major website, has seen the blog trend expand and even devotes an entire section to the phenomenon.
Mixed in with the bloggers on his website are names the Ol' Columnist recognized: Charles Adler, Andrew Coyne, George Jonas and Paul Wells. However, those I decided to steer clear of had handles such as Armchair Garbageman, The Black Kettle, Eleanor Brown's Opinionated Lesbian, Conspiracy Girlfriend and one I definitely don't plan to go near: Small Dead Animals.
So, it just a Canadian "thing," I thought.
Wrong.
In the San Francisco Chronicle, there's this fact from Ipsos Public Affairs that nearly a third of Americans online have read a blog, and more than a third of those do so at least once a week. "There are 12 million English language blogs and counting with new celeblogs elbowing their way into cyberspace every day," reads the report.
It went even further with this: "Britney Spears, whose wardrobe should resolve any question about this pop tart's affinity for navel-gazing, maintains a stream-of- consciousness journal she calls "Love, B." Those who peruse it will learn how much she adored Vegas ("Like Disney World for adults"), what a tough time her dogs are having with potty training ("and we have white carpets!") and all the travails of her home renovation: "Kevin thinks everyone will work faster if we stay at the house. .. . I've also been thinking of different ideas for the prayer and meditation room. Everything is going so well lately -- it literally brings me to my knees."
And ol' Brit's not alone.
Did you know that San Francisco Giants' slugger Barry Bonds has his blog days when he's not resting that wonky leg. That's right, the current home run kingpin shared on June 10, his knee "is getting stronger, and although the swelling is minimal, we still have to be cautious." Then he described watching his daughter graduate from the eighth grade in her pink dress, peppering the entire account with mind-numbing product placement: "After the ceremony, when I got home, I downloaded the pictures to my G4 laptop, prepared the photos in PhotoShop and created photo album in iPhoto for my mother, daughter and me. After that, I got a little creative and made a DVD with iDVD."
And here's one that Mr. Spock is shaking his head about. It seems Captain Kirk (Bill Shatner) has a blog called "Bill's Space." In a recent episode, Shatner and Miss Elizabeth just couldn't find a great plate of spaghetti. Ah, the trials of a celebrity blogger in California.
Some celebrity bloggers, you wouldn't want to quote such as Rosie O'Donnell laughing so hard she "tinkled" and then there's Melanie Griffith's bad-mouthing all the tabloids and defending her husband, Antonio Banderas. "He is not losing his hair and spray-painting a bald spot."
There are always blog loads of political rhetoric. Well, sort of.
Pat Sajak from "Wheel of Fortune" claims his PUB (Pat's Unified Beer) hypothesis in regards to winning U.S. presidential candidates. On his blog, he wrote: "The Democrats seem bound and determined to nominate Senator Hillary Clinton. If there is any merit to the PUB theory, that would be a fatal mistake. A beer with Hillary? That might put a lot of people on the wagon."
However, one country that bloggers are not free to wander on the Net is, you guessed it, China.
It seems when Chinese wuld-be bloggers enter such words and phrases such as "democracy," "freedom" and "human rights" there's a warning message" "Prohibited language in text, please delete"
Reporters Without Borders, a global media advocacy group, claims at least 54 people have been jailed for posting essays or other content Beijing labels subversive.
The Ol' Columnist won't be blogging any time soon. He even has a hard time finding the on-button on his computer.

JUST A SIMPLE LUNCH AT $351,100 (U.S.): That's what it finally cost an anonymous diner to have a few sandwiches with billionaire investor Warren E. Buffett. The eBay charity auction started with a $25,000 bid on June 23. Last year's take was $202,100. The auction proceeds go to the Glide Foundation, a San Francisco charity that aids the poor and homeless. As for me, I'll just have a Big Mac to go, thank you.